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Le Zombie, v. 5, issue 4, whole no. 51, January 1943
Page 19
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19 THE STAR STOMPER -by- Cuthelbert Jones II The 37th edition of the Interworld Follies opened in the new Million-Dollar Moon Bowl the other day; and thereby hangs an interesting tale. When the Follies used to be presented in their old home, the Lowndes Memorial Theatre in New York City, many hundreds of Martians , Venerians, and other planeteers had to rocket in and out again in a comparatively short time, not to mention untangling the yards and yards of red tape necessary to land on Earth. The diplomatic magicians from the three worlds put their alleged skulls together to find a way out , and ended up by backing the building of the giant interplanetary freeport recreation grounds just outside of St. Morojo, Esperstate. The Moon Bowl being the largest building in the project, the Follies promptly moved in; thus a new vacation resort was made--not born. All the better passenger lines will soon announce cheaper excursion rates to the port. Sam (7) Russell is a minature dictator over the place, having the final say-so over everything. But his salary is scandalously high! -- -- -- -- I sat in row A at the grand opening and noted several curious facts. First: the amazing number of Earth girls that are being surplanted with Venerians and Martians. True, as many customers come from yon worlds as from ours, but in the past all races have shown a preference for our satiny smooth-skinned girls to their own; not saying, mind you, that the gals from Venus aren't attractive in their baby-blue scales & webs. Second amazing fact is that for the first time in Follies history, a girl from Ganymede is in the show, having a solo whistling number early in the third stanza. I have long held that the musical pipes of the Gany-girls were divine to the ear; and at last some mogul behind the scenes thinks so too. Third: the outstanding amount of Mercurian political propaganda creeping into the song and script! In the second act, fifth scene, a Martian lassie exits with "... I'm off to call good old Tige." The radical Mr Tiger is again mentioned in a favorable light in the fourth act and in the afterlogue. If the alleged authors of the show cared, they would find a little law tucked away in the book to the effect that such goings-on are taboo on the Moon, being free. -- -- -- -- Arriving on a second-class passenger picket yesterday came a sweet little miss wrapped up in blonde wig and dark glasses. But ordinary passengers don't rate salutes from ships' officers, not to mention cubic feet of bodyguards. The line wont admit it but could she be Princess Trudy (Hudson-America) returning incog from a randevoo? There is a gay young blade tending light on asteroid PL1739 and his bracket number makes him eligible if she really cares. This has been going on for months now folks. -- -- -- -- About two months ago the newscasters put on a small circus over the blasting-off party of that oh-so-heroic gentleman who claimed he was going to rocket around the sun. The stupendous send-off they gave him will be put to shame in view of the gigantic preparations now being made to receive him home again. Tip to newscasters: your little hero is holed up in section 31 on the fringe of the Moon's dark rim, awaiting the proper time to come sweeping in "from his trip around the sun." You're welcome. -- -- -- --
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19 THE STAR STOMPER -by- Cuthelbert Jones II The 37th edition of the Interworld Follies opened in the new Million-Dollar Moon Bowl the other day; and thereby hangs an interesting tale. When the Follies used to be presented in their old home, the Lowndes Memorial Theatre in New York City, many hundreds of Martians , Venerians, and other planeteers had to rocket in and out again in a comparatively short time, not to mention untangling the yards and yards of red tape necessary to land on Earth. The diplomatic magicians from the three worlds put their alleged skulls together to find a way out , and ended up by backing the building of the giant interplanetary freeport recreation grounds just outside of St. Morojo, Esperstate. The Moon Bowl being the largest building in the project, the Follies promptly moved in; thus a new vacation resort was made--not born. All the better passenger lines will soon announce cheaper excursion rates to the port. Sam (7) Russell is a minature dictator over the place, having the final say-so over everything. But his salary is scandalously high! -- -- -- -- I sat in row A at the grand opening and noted several curious facts. First: the amazing number of Earth girls that are being surplanted with Venerians and Martians. True, as many customers come from yon worlds as from ours, but in the past all races have shown a preference for our satiny smooth-skinned girls to their own; not saying, mind you, that the gals from Venus aren't attractive in their baby-blue scales & webs. Second amazing fact is that for the first time in Follies history, a girl from Ganymede is in the show, having a solo whistling number early in the third stanza. I have long held that the musical pipes of the Gany-girls were divine to the ear; and at last some mogul behind the scenes thinks so too. Third: the outstanding amount of Mercurian political propaganda creeping into the song and script! In the second act, fifth scene, a Martian lassie exits with "... I'm off to call good old Tige." The radical Mr Tiger is again mentioned in a favorable light in the fourth act and in the afterlogue. If the alleged authors of the show cared, they would find a little law tucked away in the book to the effect that such goings-on are taboo on the Moon, being free. -- -- -- -- Arriving on a second-class passenger picket yesterday came a sweet little miss wrapped up in blonde wig and dark glasses. But ordinary passengers don't rate salutes from ships' officers, not to mention cubic feet of bodyguards. The line wont admit it but could she be Princess Trudy (Hudson-America) returning incog from a randevoo? There is a gay young blade tending light on asteroid PL1739 and his bracket number makes him eligible if she really cares. This has been going on for months now folks. -- -- -- -- About two months ago the newscasters put on a small circus over the blasting-off party of that oh-so-heroic gentleman who claimed he was going to rocket around the sun. The stupendous send-off they gave him will be put to shame in view of the gigantic preparations now being made to receive him home again. Tip to newscasters: your little hero is holed up in section 31 on the fringe of the Moon's dark rim, awaiting the proper time to come sweeping in "from his trip around the sun." You're welcome. -- -- -- --
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