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Funtasy, v. 1, issue 1, Spring 1939

Page 10

FUNTASY                                    Page 10

sixth or blue; no chaine to enabel me to walk through walls; no contrivance to shrink me out of my difficulty; no apparatus to transport my component atoms elsewhere in the form of vibrations; no ability to yearn myself back to Earth. I turned to the door and lit a match for the fuse. Then a thought struck me--I tried the door. It opened. I left.

   As I stepped out of the doorway, I instinctively struck out blindly in all directions at once to overcome the guards. Any SFN. fan would have done the same. After ten minutes of furious struggling, I sank to the floor, exhausted; then I noticed that there had been no guards there at all. (What! No guards!) This made me mad, so I left the narrow corridor.

   I came out into a great hall, and an insect-man greeted me nervously. "Didn't you like the room?", he clacked. We gave you the best in the hotel." My mind, already weakened by sciencefictionitis, collapsed utterly, so I sent this message which will fall on the Gobi Desert, thirteen miles, seventeen feet, and nine and one-half inches from any designated point. Nuts to thee......:

   So ended the tragic message in the second missile in that heap of fused meteorites (actually hollow containers, etc.). We of the Ackerman-Darrow Scientifictionic Expedition hope to send you others of these amazing messages after translation by Pretcher Flatt and verification by Professor Crackpot, SFN. Doc.
                       THE END 

(Re-printed through the courtesy of Mr. Leo Margulies and THRILLING WONDER STORIES.)
*******************************************************
                      FUNTASY 
                       -presents-
          ITS HAM AND MAGS . PENSION PLAN!!
44¢ Every Friday to all Science-Fiction FANS!!!

   PUT the country back on its feet!
   PUT Sfn. back on its feet! 
   PUT FUNTASY back on its feet!

This bill is endorsed by Senators and Congressmen everywhere! Representative Pander Grabble says, quote, "It'sh shtupendoush; colosshal, magnifishent! I'll shupport it with my dying breath!" unquote. And why not you too? --Although we hope your breath isn't like Grabble's! Phee----ew! Let your voices be heard! Demand enough money weekly to meet the flood of new science-fiction mags!                 Watch for further details!!!!

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FUNTASY Page 10 sixth or blue; no chaine to enabel me to walk through walls; no contrivance to shrink me out of my difficulty; no apparatus to transport my component atoms elsewhere in the form of vibrations; no ability to yearn myself back to Earth. I turned to the door and lit a match for the fuse. Then a thought struck me--I tried the door. It opened. I left. As I stepped out of the doorway, I instinctively struck out blindly in all directions at once to overcome the guards. Any SFN. fan would have done the same. After ten minutes of furious struggling, I sank to the floor, exhausted; then I noticed that there had been no guards there at all. (What! No guards!) This made me mad, so I left the narrow corridor. I came out into a great hall, and an insect-man greeted me nervously. "Didn't you like the room?", he clacked. We gave you the best in the hotel." My mind, already weakened by sciencefictionitis, collapsed utterly, so I sent this message which will fall on the Gobi Desert, thirteen miles, seventeen feet, and nine and one-half inches from any designated point. Nuts to thee......: So ended the tragic message in the second missile in that heap of fused meteorites (actually hollow containers, etc.). We of the Ackerman-Darrow Scientifictionic Expedition hope to send you others of these amazing messages after translation by Pretcher Flatt and verification by Professor Crackpot, SFN. Doc. THE END (Re-printed through the courtesy of Mr. Leo Margulies and THRILLING WONDER STORIES.) ******************************************************* FUNTASY -presents- ITS HAM AND MAGS . PENSION PLAN!! 44¢ Every Friday to all Science-Fiction FANS!!! PUT the country back on its feet! PUT Sfn. back on its feet! PUT FUNTASY back on its feet! This bill is endorsed by Senators and Congressmen everywhere! Representative Pander Grabble says, quote, "It'sh shtupendoush; colosshal, magnifishent! I'll shupport it with my dying breath!" unquote. And why not you too? --Although we hope your breath isn't like Grabble's! Phee----ew! Let your voices be heard! Demand enough money weekly to meet the flood of new science-fiction mags! Watch for further details!!!!