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Fantasy Fictioneer, v. 1, issue 1, Novemeber-December 1939
Page 9
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Nov.-Dec. FANTASY FICTIONEER 9 [centered] "The Director's Message" (if that means anything!) by Bob Tucker. Being the Director of the IFF, and thus automatically becoming high - thingamabob, my "message" was immediatly shifted back here to page nine, a position of honor I am told. (You will probably find the Editor shoot-ing off his mouth way up front somewhere!) As to imparting a message of cheer and spontaneous combustion to you kiddies, I am afraid you are going to be bitterly dissapointed, for I find that everything I had in mind to say, all the reports earlier in this issue say for me. There just isn't a darn thing to say more, of a serious nature concerning the IFF or the Chicon. I will do my best tho, to give you a "message" of various commentary remarks, after reading other "messages" in [t]he issue: I really urge you to attend the Chicon, for Reinsberg reports the Mil-waukee Fictioneers will be there in a body. This will be some sight, I assure you, for I am unaware at the present moment just who's body they plan to occupy, but the sight of a dozen or two Fictioneers in one body is just going to be [underlined] too good to miss! Then too, we may be able to per-suade some of them to come out of the body an ddance around in their bones, thus adding invaluable spice to the program already arranged! Another statement that arouses my curiosity is the one that runs some-thing like this: "soandso are behind us in this great movement!" I wonder how far behind? It would be a pity if we were to attend the Chi-con only to find some of the big names were so far behind us they hadn't left home yet! Or another interpretation could be attached to that statement, such as: "Say bud, see that big lug up there on the platform, second from the left....well, that's Tucker. Now here's an egg....let him have it! Go on, don't be scard, I'm [next three words underlined] right behind you!" The arm tossing the egg would be the "movement". In our Constitution there is a statement to the effect that I get to run the IFF most any darn way I please, providing I do it according to the U.S. Constitution. Now is the time for me to come forward with the announcement that the US Constitution is "horse and buggy'd", etc. Too, I am thinking of giving myself a salary. Just as soon as I hear form the Secretary-Treasurer how much money reposes without our coffers, I will most likely give myself an annual salary and take the next ten year's pay out all at once in case their ain't no treasury ten years from now. Members are invited to contribute to this magazine y'know. I get a big kick out of this, for long before your manuscripts see print, I have gone over them with a fine tooth comb, picking out juicy phrases, hil-arious situations, the very ideas themselves, and written them up into another article submitted to some other magazine. ....and by the time your's appears here, it will be branded as a carboon copy. Too, I get an unimaginable joy watching Editor Roberds go thru your manuscripts with a long black pencil....oh, how that guy can edit! Ask Korshak! The only way to get around having your gems censored here is to type the stencil yourself, print it some night when he isn't around, and smuggle it into the issue, like I did this! [centered] ##
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Nov.-Dec. FANTASY FICTIONEER 9 [centered] "The Director's Message" (if that means anything!) by Bob Tucker. Being the Director of the IFF, and thus automatically becoming high - thingamabob, my "message" was immediatly shifted back here to page nine, a position of honor I am told. (You will probably find the Editor shoot-ing off his mouth way up front somewhere!) As to imparting a message of cheer and spontaneous combustion to you kiddies, I am afraid you are going to be bitterly dissapointed, for I find that everything I had in mind to say, all the reports earlier in this issue say for me. There just isn't a darn thing to say more, of a serious nature concerning the IFF or the Chicon. I will do my best tho, to give you a "message" of various commentary remarks, after reading other "messages" in [t]he issue: I really urge you to attend the Chicon, for Reinsberg reports the Mil-waukee Fictioneers will be there in a body. This will be some sight, I assure you, for I am unaware at the present moment just who's body they plan to occupy, but the sight of a dozen or two Fictioneers in one body is just going to be [underlined] too good to miss! Then too, we may be able to per-suade some of them to come out of the body an ddance around in their bones, thus adding invaluable spice to the program already arranged! Another statement that arouses my curiosity is the one that runs some-thing like this: "soandso are behind us in this great movement!" I wonder how far behind? It would be a pity if we were to attend the Chi-con only to find some of the big names were so far behind us they hadn't left home yet! Or another interpretation could be attached to that statement, such as: "Say bud, see that big lug up there on the platform, second from the left....well, that's Tucker. Now here's an egg....let him have it! Go on, don't be scard, I'm [next three words underlined] right behind you!" The arm tossing the egg would be the "movement". In our Constitution there is a statement to the effect that I get to run the IFF most any darn way I please, providing I do it according to the U.S. Constitution. Now is the time for me to come forward with the announcement that the US Constitution is "horse and buggy'd", etc. Too, I am thinking of giving myself a salary. Just as soon as I hear form the Secretary-Treasurer how much money reposes without our coffers, I will most likely give myself an annual salary and take the next ten year's pay out all at once in case their ain't no treasury ten years from now. Members are invited to contribute to this magazine y'know. I get a big kick out of this, for long before your manuscripts see print, I have gone over them with a fine tooth comb, picking out juicy phrases, hil-arious situations, the very ideas themselves, and written them up into another article submitted to some other magazine. ....and by the time your's appears here, it will be branded as a carboon copy. Too, I get an unimaginable joy watching Editor Roberds go thru your manuscripts with a long black pencil....oh, how that guy can edit! Ask Korshak! The only way to get around having your gems censored here is to type the stencil yourself, print it some night when he isn't around, and smuggle it into the issue, like I did this! [centered] ##
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