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Snide, issue 1, May 1940
Page 9
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pebbles within a stone's throw of camp. He makes the conservative estimate that fifty million pebbles lie out there at our feet. Somehow, the thought doesn't stir us. Jeaves, with his compact little specimen bag, has discovered a new plant containing a new type of sugar. It should make a new type of alcohol, he says. We are brewing up some today. Barnay and Parsen have gone off together and are learning how to read. Barnay is cross-eyed, which complicates matters. Captain Batwell, Ginerton, and myself have done a little scouting around. Heavily loaded, we have staggered part way into the jungle. The pink elephants and alligators charged now and then, but we found a simple way to stop them. We quickly form a circle and feed each other seltzer tablets. Then they go away. Stilson is working out a new way to peel an orange from the inside. He says the world of science will be astounded. Two Thousand, Three Hundred Oh Hell I've Lost Track. But in all our activities one thing has loomed in our minds. The totem pole. At last Captain Batwell gave the word, after due consideration and sleeping it off. Away we went over the rough pebbles to the totem pole, a hundred yard away. It was the farthest we had gone from our sip. Impressed by our own daring, we tottered cautiously around the ancient structure. Evil seemed to hang over it like a pall. 'Men,' said Captain Batwell, impressively, 'men, cut down that pall so we can see what we're doing.' 9
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pebbles within a stone's throw of camp. He makes the conservative estimate that fifty million pebbles lie out there at our feet. Somehow, the thought doesn't stir us. Jeaves, with his compact little specimen bag, has discovered a new plant containing a new type of sugar. It should make a new type of alcohol, he says. We are brewing up some today. Barnay and Parsen have gone off together and are learning how to read. Barnay is cross-eyed, which complicates matters. Captain Batwell, Ginerton, and myself have done a little scouting around. Heavily loaded, we have staggered part way into the jungle. The pink elephants and alligators charged now and then, but we found a simple way to stop them. We quickly form a circle and feed each other seltzer tablets. Then they go away. Stilson is working out a new way to peel an orange from the inside. He says the world of science will be astounded. Two Thousand, Three Hundred Oh Hell I've Lost Track. But in all our activities one thing has loomed in our minds. The totem pole. At last Captain Batwell gave the word, after due consideration and sleeping it off. Away we went over the rough pebbles to the totem pole, a hundred yard away. It was the farthest we had gone from our sip. Impressed by our own daring, we tottered cautiously around the ancient structure. Evil seemed to hang over it like a pall. 'Men,' said Captain Batwell, impressively, 'men, cut down that pall so we can see what we're doing.' 9
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