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Science Fiction Savant, issue 5, Summer 1946
Page 7
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[Hand Symbols of the Universe [Illegible]] Droopwater prepare for the worst!" Mr. Droprun Dripdrudge then vanished. Droopwater---darn--- Dredgewater would have slept until two p.m., but not today. His rest was abruptly terminated at ten o'clock a.m. by the bassoon voice of Mr. Slip, the business brains of Facts and Figures Typewriter Company. He pulled his boss out of bed and immediately began his excited chatter. "What's wrong?" yawned Dredgewater. "What's wrong! What's wrong! Do you know what has been happening?" "No." Mr. Slip beat his bald head, pulled his fuzz, which he seriously called a beard. "Well Droopwater!" demanded Slip. "Dredgewater!" "Look you moron," shrieked Slip. "All our adding machines are subtracting. Our typewriters write long hand. To say nothing of your love stories turning into mush!" "Weren't that they before?" questioned Dredgewater. At the desk sat a bedraggled person. His hair hung down over his eyes. He groped about his desk hunting for a cigar butt; finding it he dejectedly thrust it into his bared fangs. "Well---ll---ll, Mr. Droopwater!" Dredgewater cringed, that flute pitched voice belonged to only one person. "Yes," gulped Dredgewater. "I see you've had enough. Well I can't blame you a bit. I've been sent here to negotiate a peace with you. My terms are as follows: "Do you promise never to publish such stuff as the following under the title of humor--? 'I don't kiss and I don't neck, I don't say darn and I don't say heck, I don't play poker and I don't shoot dice, I'm never naughty, I'm always nice. I have no line, I don't play tricks. But what the hell, I'm only six.' "Never print any descriptions like this: 'She drew up to him, her sapphire lips shaped in a graceful Cupid bow, ready to release a gold tipped shaft of love.' "If you violate these terms, we of the Associated Letters, Numerals, and Short Hand Symbols of the Universe will ---- ---- [eighth note symbol?]" Pardon me again, but I'll hust have to close his quotation marks. You have already heard the line of Mr. Droprun Dripdrudge. So long dear readers. dripdrudge drama. . the dripdrudge drama. testing
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[Hand Symbols of the Universe [Illegible]] Droopwater prepare for the worst!" Mr. Droprun Dripdrudge then vanished. Droopwater---darn--- Dredgewater would have slept until two p.m., but not today. His rest was abruptly terminated at ten o'clock a.m. by the bassoon voice of Mr. Slip, the business brains of Facts and Figures Typewriter Company. He pulled his boss out of bed and immediately began his excited chatter. "What's wrong?" yawned Dredgewater. "What's wrong! What's wrong! Do you know what has been happening?" "No." Mr. Slip beat his bald head, pulled his fuzz, which he seriously called a beard. "Well Droopwater!" demanded Slip. "Dredgewater!" "Look you moron," shrieked Slip. "All our adding machines are subtracting. Our typewriters write long hand. To say nothing of your love stories turning into mush!" "Weren't that they before?" questioned Dredgewater. At the desk sat a bedraggled person. His hair hung down over his eyes. He groped about his desk hunting for a cigar butt; finding it he dejectedly thrust it into his bared fangs. "Well---ll---ll, Mr. Droopwater!" Dredgewater cringed, that flute pitched voice belonged to only one person. "Yes," gulped Dredgewater. "I see you've had enough. Well I can't blame you a bit. I've been sent here to negotiate a peace with you. My terms are as follows: "Do you promise never to publish such stuff as the following under the title of humor--? 'I don't kiss and I don't neck, I don't say darn and I don't say heck, I don't play poker and I don't shoot dice, I'm never naughty, I'm always nice. I have no line, I don't play tricks. But what the hell, I'm only six.' "Never print any descriptions like this: 'She drew up to him, her sapphire lips shaped in a graceful Cupid bow, ready to release a gold tipped shaft of love.' "If you violate these terms, we of the Associated Letters, Numerals, and Short Hand Symbols of the Universe will ---- ---- [eighth note symbol?]" Pardon me again, but I'll hust have to close his quotation marks. You have already heard the line of Mr. Droprun Dripdrudge. So long dear readers. dripdrudge drama. . the dripdrudge drama. testing
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