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Temper!, v. 1, issue 2 July 1945

Page 4

TEMPER! The Quarterly of Creative Sociology        Page 4

A Study on the Peculiarities and Customs of Homo Sapa, Species: Civilized; Genus; Pipe-Smoker; Sex: Male.
   (Note: this study was compiled for TEMPER! by its own research bureau over a period of more than six months, in which all members of the bureau not only studied all available literature on the subject, but actually went out to live among the species. We present the study, without commentary, feeling that the subject-matter is sufficient in itself.)
   They enter the room, sit down, and survey each other with the faint suspicion which, in civilized society, has taken the place of outright hostility to the stranger. Each, in an almost identical gesture of nervous quest for reassurance, reaches into his pocket, pulls out his pipe. The pouches appear, again simultaneously. They busy themselves for a brief period with scraping, filling, tamping.
   Each man appears to be totally preoccupied with his own pipe, and the attention it needs, but each one manages to maintain a permanent sidewise lookout, passing judgement on the other's pipe, craning for a glimpse of the color and cut of his tobacco, even sniffing a little visibly to catch the aroma. Each is critically analyzing the pipe-cleaning, pipe-filling methods of the other.
   They are ready at the same time. One wooden match scrapes heavily against the sole of a shoe, followed a fraction of a second later by the faintest smile of complacent self-satisfaction on the face of the other man as he deftly pricks his own match into flame with a thumb-nail. They are both smoking now.
   All the while, covering the cruder aspects of the contest, there has been smalltalk. According to their profession, location, status in life, they have been discussing the topic of the moment...contracts, cubism, combustion engines, communism, musical comedy, or chemistry. Audibly, there has been nothing but utter amiability. Only to the trained observer's eye is the conflict at all apparent.
   Now each man's face, seen through the mellowing haze of pipe-smoke, begins to assume softer, more human lines. The conversational by-play happens upon a point of mutual interest even agreement, and one of the men ventures the first advance, asks what the other is smoking.
   He is proffered a pouch; the name is given. He smells the tobacco, appraises it, hands over his own pouch, extolls the virtues of his own brand. The talk becomes a briefly heated argument, and the men begin to become aware of each other's intelligence, to sense the presence of sound and wholesome human values in each other. Pipes are exchanged for the moment, minutely
   (continued on back cover)

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TEMPER! The Quarterly of Creative Sociology Page 4 A Study on the Peculiarities and Customs of Homo Sapa, Species: Civilized; Genus; Pipe-Smoker; Sex: Male. (Note: this study was compiled for TEMPER! by its own research bureau over a period of more than six months, in which all members of the bureau not only studied all available literature on the subject, but actually went out to live among the species. We present the study, without commentary, feeling that the subject-matter is sufficient in itself.) They enter the room, sit down, and survey each other with the faint suspicion which, in civilized society, has taken the place of outright hostility to the stranger. Each, in an almost identical gesture of nervous quest for reassurance, reaches into his pocket, pulls out his pipe. The pouches appear, again simultaneously. They busy themselves for a brief period with scraping, filling, tamping. Each man appears to be totally preoccupied with his own pipe, and the attention it needs, but each one manages to maintain a permanent sidewise lookout, passing judgement on the other's pipe, craning for a glimpse of the color and cut of his tobacco, even sniffing a little visibly to catch the aroma. Each is critically analyzing the pipe-cleaning, pipe-filling methods of the other. They are ready at the same time. One wooden match scrapes heavily against the sole of a shoe, followed a fraction of a second later by the faintest smile of complacent self-satisfaction on the face of the other man as he deftly pricks his own match into flame with a thumb-nail. They are both smoking now. All the while, covering the cruder aspects of the contest, there has been smalltalk. According to their profession, location, status in life, they have been discussing the topic of the moment...contracts, cubism, combustion engines, communism, musical comedy, or chemistry. Audibly, there has been nothing but utter amiability. Only to the trained observer's eye is the conflict at all apparent. Now each man's face, seen through the mellowing haze of pipe-smoke, begins to assume softer, more human lines. The conversational by-play happens upon a point of mutual interest even agreement, and one of the men ventures the first advance, asks what the other is smoking. He is proffered a pouch; the name is given. He smells the tobacco, appraises it, hands over his own pouch, extolls the virtues of his own brand. The talk becomes a briefly heated argument, and the men begin to become aware of each other's intelligence, to sense the presence of sound and wholesome human values in each other. Pipes are exchanged for the moment, minutely (continued on back cover)