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Fanfare, issue 9, 1942
Page 14
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14 of lice & men Pogo: Don't touch me you foul fiend! Oh! If only my screams could be heard! But here, miles from anywhere....oooh! (More sobbing.) A tap at the door. Pong hides Pogo in the closet. He trips on his robe on the way to the door. He finally gets it open, and the Poll Cat pushes his way in.) PC: I'm taking the U Sewell poll on the slans' favorite slan. You vote for me. Good! I'll just write that down here . . . H: I do not vote for you. Number One's place seems pretty set to me. Anyway I think that Tucker chap should be Number One. PC: Who are you? H: I am - er - Prof K's assistant. PC: Where's the prof? H: Out to lunch. PC: But it's night now! H: He's a busy man. Eats late. (Muffled sound from closet.) PC: What's that noise? H: (Aside) Gad! I forgot to re-gag her! (To PC) Oh - heh - heh. Just an - er - cat in the closet. PC: No! I'm a Poll Cat. Lemme see it. Might smother in there. H: Oh no, really, prof k is very touchy about his cats. Well--heh heh - cheerio! That is - g'bye now! (Holds door open.) PC: Sure y' don't wanna vote for me? I'd be a very good No. 1.... H: My mind is made up. PC: Made up of what? H: I am deeply hurt! Leave at once, or I shall challenge you to a duel! PC: Duel? Right off the bat y' wanna duel! Have you no duel control? Heheh, pretty good, eh? Du--- H: Good Bye! And it's not funny. (He pushes PC out, closes door, leans weakly against it.) Whew! (The curtain falls.) Scene Three: Slan headquarters. No. 1 still at his desk. PC and Con Man stand before him. he glares at PC. #1: So you too failed. you too, brute! (Curses in Esperanto.) Go out and take a poll on dopes. Vote for yourself as headope. Furthermore - Yngvi is a louse! PC: Y - yessir! (Exit) CM: You're right, No. 1; Yngvi is a louse! #1: Who told you? CM: Joe Fann. Wrote to me, he did, said he'd be at the next convention in disguise. #1: Who is Joe Fann? CM: He writes postal cards, sir. #1: O well - look now - you go to Prof K's lab. I have half a mind . . . CM: Really, sir? #1: I have half a mind to believe that there's dirty work afoot there. CM: Somebody washing their feet, sir? #1: No, you dope! I think mebbe there's a monster there. A man-made one. I feel it in my bones - no - in my brain! Gad! It's mental telepathy! A message from Yngvi! Go at once! Both of you! You and Yngvi! (CM exit) (The curtain falls) Act Three, Scene One: The lab. C is alone with the bound Pogo.
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14 of lice & men Pogo: Don't touch me you foul fiend! Oh! If only my screams could be heard! But here, miles from anywhere....oooh! (More sobbing.) A tap at the door. Pong hides Pogo in the closet. He trips on his robe on the way to the door. He finally gets it open, and the Poll Cat pushes his way in.) PC: I'm taking the U Sewell poll on the slans' favorite slan. You vote for me. Good! I'll just write that down here . . . H: I do not vote for you. Number One's place seems pretty set to me. Anyway I think that Tucker chap should be Number One. PC: Who are you? H: I am - er - Prof K's assistant. PC: Where's the prof? H: Out to lunch. PC: But it's night now! H: He's a busy man. Eats late. (Muffled sound from closet.) PC: What's that noise? H: (Aside) Gad! I forgot to re-gag her! (To PC) Oh - heh - heh. Just an - er - cat in the closet. PC: No! I'm a Poll Cat. Lemme see it. Might smother in there. H: Oh no, really, prof k is very touchy about his cats. Well--heh heh - cheerio! That is - g'bye now! (Holds door open.) PC: Sure y' don't wanna vote for me? I'd be a very good No. 1.... H: My mind is made up. PC: Made up of what? H: I am deeply hurt! Leave at once, or I shall challenge you to a duel! PC: Duel? Right off the bat y' wanna duel! Have you no duel control? Heheh, pretty good, eh? Du--- H: Good Bye! And it's not funny. (He pushes PC out, closes door, leans weakly against it.) Whew! (The curtain falls.) Scene Three: Slan headquarters. No. 1 still at his desk. PC and Con Man stand before him. he glares at PC. #1: So you too failed. you too, brute! (Curses in Esperanto.) Go out and take a poll on dopes. Vote for yourself as headope. Furthermore - Yngvi is a louse! PC: Y - yessir! (Exit) CM: You're right, No. 1; Yngvi is a louse! #1: Who told you? CM: Joe Fann. Wrote to me, he did, said he'd be at the next convention in disguise. #1: Who is Joe Fann? CM: He writes postal cards, sir. #1: O well - look now - you go to Prof K's lab. I have half a mind . . . CM: Really, sir? #1: I have half a mind to believe that there's dirty work afoot there. CM: Somebody washing their feet, sir? #1: No, you dope! I think mebbe there's a monster there. A man-made one. I feel it in my bones - no - in my brain! Gad! It's mental telepathy! A message from Yngvi! Go at once! Both of you! You and Yngvi! (CM exit) (The curtain falls) Act Three, Scene One: The lab. C is alone with the bound Pogo.
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